By Josh Miller

ISBN-10: 1569758603

ISBN-13: 9781569758601

Americans were taught that their kingdom is civilized and humane. yet, too usually, U.S. activities were uncivilized and inhumane.
—Howard Zinn

Shedding mild on 500 years of suppression, this surprising exposé unearths the pivotal function in American historical past performed via its such a lot invisible minority—zombies.

From colonization and revolution to international Wars and international hegemony, A Zombie’s historical past of the United States tells the strong and relocating tales of this country’s living-dead underclass, including:

•The zombie bloodbath of ecu colonists at Plymouth Rock

•The grotesque killing of a zombinated Meriwether Lewis via his fellow explorer William Clark

•The doomed safety of the Alamo opposed to hordes of the attacking undead

•The heroic, platoon-saving cost right into a hail of German fireplace by means of an undead Lt. Audie Murphy

•The top-secret NASA missions that launched(and frequently misplaced) zombies into space

•The anti-terrorist application to forestall the weaponization of the zombie virus

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Extra resources for A Zombie's History of the United States: From the Massacre at Plymouth Rock to the CIA's Secret War on the Undead

Sample text

61 A Zombie’s History of tHe United stAtes after a hunt when they were charged by an enormously fat zombie, hungry for brains. The other children climbed trees and hid, but young Lewis calmly raised his rifle and shot the zombie square between the eyes. Another such story concerns a zombie attack on the family’s cabin, which, lasting several days, forced the family to camp in the woods for safety. One night a foolish member of the camp started a fire, giving their position away. The zombies fell upon them.

Despite only being twenty-six years old, Clark retired from military life on July 4, 1796, due to poor health. He returned to his family plantation in Kentucky where he would peacefully remain, 62 The Corpse of Discovery until the fateful day an old colleague suggested him for the adventure of a lifetime. Planning for Adventure If faced by superior forces of Undead so hearty as to stop the expedition, you must decline its further pursuit, and return. In the loss of yourselves, we should lose also the information you will have acquired.

The situation was ripe for conflict. The Creeping Lurch to War Among the natural rights of the colonists are these: First a right to life, secondly to liberty, and thirdly to property; together with the right to defend them against man and walking dead in the best manner they can. ——Samuel—Adams,—The Rights of the Colonists,—1772 In 1768, two thousand British soldiers were still quartered in Boston. The French and Indian War long over, soldiers began taking jobs normally held by colonists at a time when jobs were already scarce.

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A Zombie's History of the United States: From the Massacre at Plymouth Rock to the CIA's Secret War on the Undead by Josh Miller

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